Elliot's A1 English

One day Elliot was bragging to me about how good his english was amongst all his friends..
Elliot : Gor, you know my friends always ask me about english words,they're so stupid .. i have the best english amongst them !
*Customer walks in .. picks up a dvd game
Elliot reads the title .. F.E.A.R. ..far ! ..Gor this far game nice arh ?

)(*&&^%%$$##@#$@

Elliot numbness

me: Elliot when you go back do remember to copy those newer discs and leave the older ones.
Elliot : ok, ( driving )
*Five minutes later
Elliot : Gor, later we get back please tell me which of those old discs u want to copy...
*fainted ...

Elliot daftness

Elliot:Gor, i can't email this document to the guy, the uploading always stop halfway..
me: did you try with your other e-mail accounts ?
Elliot: i tried liao, hotmail also cannot.. yahoo also cannot..
me: why don't you try using gmail ?
Elliot: i don't have gmail !
me: So who opened the hotmail and yahoo account for u ?
Elliot : i opened it myself
me : You don't know how to open a new gmail account and send arh ? *headache

Elliot laziness

Everyday i had to wake this chap up, he can't wake by himself..
So getting fedup, i began to tell him off ..
me: Elliot you can't depend on me waking u up every morning, if you can't wake up for work why don't u sleep earlier instead of watching online movies and chatting on the phone the whole nite ???
Elliot:Gor, its no use.. even if i go to sleep early i still cannot wake up, i can sleep more than 10 hours a day or more oneee...
me : *speechless

Elliot arh Elliot ...

I have a cousin called elliot, his father is of chinese ethnic, mum's siamese..
Sadly he has failed to inherit his father's brains nor siamese's diligence..
Hence ...this is the story when he stayed with me